ritE of Passage
Sun 7.30.23
The photo of Abraham Lincoln above is of a young man, strong-minded, determined and prepared to stand his truth and defend himself against an adversarial system. Young, of limited means, his beliefs, philosophy, ethics will be seriously challenged as he advances in his career. He is a lawyer who has dedicated himself to implementing the laws of his young country of four score and seven years extent. You have to realize that as a teenage boy the founding fathers were still alive. The effect this had on the studious boy who is first introduced to living General George Washington through a biography was enormous. Beyond Washington, there was Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Paine and the others who influenced him. These great national heroes shaped him. One could be a go-along to get-along type or one could shape one’s life as a principled endeavor. He chose the latter and sought always to strive for the impeccable approach.
As a child in a Catholic boarding school an incident taught me a lesson about correct behavior. In refectory one evening, at our table of six among the many such tables, a new girl had been assigned to replace our tablemate Danielle who had the misfortune of being epileptic. She had a seizure at our very table, on the floor, legs akimbo, writhing body, underwear exposed. She could die, we all could and would was what ran through my mind as I watched her out of control body slamming repeatedly against the floor. The nuns wanted no part of this. The parents were summoned and Danielle was gone.
So the new girl. After a few dinners together she became more amicable and began telling us stories about sex. Eleven and twelve year olds, we knew nothing on the matter, especially in an institution whose members were dedicated to chastity. Once we heard how sexual intercourse was performed, we all five said NO! No way were we going to have some penis shoved rudely inside our bodies. The girl told us about taking part in it with her brothers, everybody in her family was doing it. You can imagine those stories spread like fire throughout the refectory. I was fingered as the culprit spreading these filthy stories.
Sister Camille called me over, had me repeat what I had heard. I was excruciatingly embarrassed to repeat such a disgusting story ro a nun who I was sure had never heard such filth in her life. Camille was a strange bird, tall, gawky, modern. She took it upon herself to make my life miserable. What’s to be expected of a girl with bad thoughts, she would call out if there was anything out of the ordinary happening around me. It was a never ending punishment. She even nixed the idea of my joining the girl scouts because of it.
One evening at dinner, she called out her refrain about my bad thoughts for the whole refectory edification -- I blew up. YOU FAT COW, I screamed back at her. You could have heard a pin drop in the room. Shortly, Camille came to my table and notified me that I was to go upstairs to the dayroom and await for the head nun, Sister Stanislas, to deal with me.
The very large and long windows of the room reflected the sunset’s orange glow as I fidgeted about waiting for Stanislas to make her appearance; I was surely going to get it now! Stanslas was a person I greatly admired. She was firm but fair, and compassionate. There was a dignity about her. I had behaved badly, humiliated Camille, questioned her authority for all to hear. Stanislas arrived, motioned me to small visitor’s room, had me lay across her lap and pulled down my pants -- Whoa! Smack, smack, smack she went at it with a strap. I can’t remember if it hurt, but I remember the incident as if it happened yesterday. No words were spoken throughout.
It was my rite of passage. What I took away from the experience was a stronger sense of self and a willingness to act on my own beliefs of what was appropriate to the circumstance.
If you look at the photo below of an older Abe Lincoln you can see that he has transcended the young man above. He is no longer prepared, he has arrived. You see that look in true and great leaders. there’s last week’s entry on Justice Thomas; look at the eyes. Sister Stanislas had it. She knew about Camille, nevertheless she would not have the sister disrespected. Abraham Lincoln said at the time of the civil war that rather than have the country rent asunder, he would allow slavery to continue to save it if need be. He believed it to be the greater good. As for that little girl with the nuns, she could not and would not allow her person to be defiled as was her natural right.
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MANHATTAN SEERESS NOW ON EBOOKS
Eight o'clock Sunday morning, the police arrive at her apartment in Greenwich Village, "How long have you been living here?" The roommate Elizabeth, after having accepted her half of the deposit money and rent for their new apartment, has called the police.
New York City doesn’t open its arms to welcome her, but she’s arrived and the adventure of her life is about to unfold. She’s come from Maine with an invitation from Sarah Lawrence College to participate in the graduate writing program.
How one becomes a seeress is what this memoir explores. Stories have been specifically selected to illustrate, from the sublime to the practical, a spiritual journey introduced in each chapter by an atout, the Tarot’s major archetypes. From the Fool, to The World, our human journey with its risk and folly unfolds. There is also an artist here alive to her new world seeking inspiration among artists on the Lower East side, learning the ways and foods of her Chinese neighbors, falling in love.
